The last day of 30 Days of D/s.

It’s a bittersweet moment. I really enjoyed delving into my brain and learning things about myself and the type of dynamic I want. How I feel about discipline and punishment, and oh so much more.

I’ve written all my thoughts on these prompts publically because I’m open and I always think someone could possibly benefit from my ramblings. Besides that, sometimes, my thoughts tend to come out better when I write them.

I’ve known some things about myself, but sometimes it’s good to write it down because you might just discover something about yourself you didn’t otherwise.

I’m sad to end this prompt, but I have a lot to think about and things to learn, and I appreciate John and Kayla for doing this. Big hugs to them!

I hope y’all enjoyed going on this journey, and continue to follow along to see what this smitten kitten is up to next.

What D/s dynamic works for you?

I mostly am a little but I find other things intriguing, too. Pet play and being a slave are also appealing.

I haven’t quite worked out what makes me intrigued by pets and slaves but there’s something about those 2 types I really like.

I find it interesting how we change. When i first started, I said to myself I didn’t want silly labels. I was just a submissive and nothing else. Then I started researching the different roles and found out that DD/LG is me, too.

Within the past month, I’ve been drawn to pet play and being a slave. I find this all very fascinating and can’t wait to see what happens next.

Exploring your kinks together.

I really haven’t explored my kinks. It’s quite sad because you’d think, by now, I would’ve.

I’ve experienced a few but not all of them. Thankfully, my Dom and I have similar kinks. I think I have at least 2 that he’s kinda “meh” about but that’s fine because those 2, electro and wax, aren’t that important to me.

The most important ones I have are bondage, impact and, even though I personally don’t see it as a kink, power exchange. There’s also debates going on that say DD/LG is a kink but for me it isn’t. It’s just who I am.

I’m glad to find someone who gets my kink/sub/little sides, not just some of my sides, and I can’t wait to actually explore with him.

Being parents and being D/s.

I don’t plan on having kids. But, for the sake of this post, let’s just say I do.

If it happens, I would do subtle D/s. I’d be open with my kids in an age-appropriate way and not hide but not be in their face about it either. I don’t think people should have to deny part of themselves once they have kids but they shouldn’t do kink right in front of them.

So yeah. Not much to say on this topic unfortunately. Sorry.

Figuring out your tasks and rituals.

I do like tasks. I don’t know about rituals so much. There is one popular one that pops into my head when I hear the word “ritual.” The “coming home” ritual. The one where the submissive is kneeling for the dominant when he comes through the door. I don’t know why that one is appealing for me but it is.

As far as tasks go, I like ones like “drink 32 ounces of water daily.” Another one I had a long time ago that was fun was when I sent my partners a list of my perfumes I had out at the time and they picked from the list which one I was to wear that day. It was fun to see what they picked.. until it became a literal song and dance.

So that’s it I guess. I’m sure there are things I’ve not thought about but I hope this is at least a starting point.

Thanks for reading!!

Is 24/7 right for you?

Yes. It is, without question. I knew it from the first time I looked it up that it was for me.

I can’t explain why, and maybe the explanation is really simple, but I am drawn to 24/7. I don’t like to do submission sometimes, like when my partner wants me to. Submission is in my core. It’s not something I do on a Friday night because I’m bored. I’ve tried those kinds of relationships and they fizzle out quickly.

Compared to most 24/7 relationships, I’d consider mine to be rather relaxed. There are probably some who think that you have to be strict and have a high protocol to be 24/7, but that’s not true. It’s a mindset. And with the right person it doesn’t take much to get me there. It’s 24/7 because I don’t turn off my submission to him. It’s there, even when I’m hanging with my friends on Clubhouse. It never fades. Sure I may have to “pretend” to be vanilla for awhile but I still don’t turn it off. Imma get really cheesy and quote a line from ome of my favorite movies. Bonus points if you can figure out what it is. “Our love is like the wind. I can’t see it, but I feel it.” Same goes for my dynamic. You may not see it but I feel it always.

Phew! My hand hurts, yall. I’m gonna publish this now. Hope y’all enjoyed reading this little peek into my head.

When a D/s relationships ends.

It sucks. That’s what happens.

I’ve had a few breakups and they’ve all been sucky.

My last breakup, which happened in October of 2020, was probably one of the worst. I wasn’t expecting it, and it kinda came out of nowhere.

I’m not sure why, and I highly doubt I’ll ever know why. That used to bother me. Sometimes if I think about it long enough it does, so I’ll stop doing that now, thanks.

I’d like to think we’re still friends. On my end I still consider him as much. He’s someone I’ll respect and appreciate, both as a human and an alpha Dom guy.

It’s taken awhile but I’m working on being happy. I’ve found a lovely Dom and I’m feeling a bit optimistic.

I don’t know that I’ll ever forget him, nor the lessons he taught me. I sincerely hope this post finds him well, and that he’s happy. Also, because I *am* that person, I do miss his voice and want to talk to him but I won’t keep pushing.

Whew. That’s a lot of feelings about one minuscule breakup. But there you have it.

Thanks for reading!

Drop is real.

What comes up, always comes down. Same goes for subspace. You may be high for a little while, but eventually, you crash.

Some people say that when they crash, they get sad, they don’t wanna talk, they’re depressed or they just don’t feel like themselves.

I get sleepy. I just wanna sleep all day and never wake up. I don’t know if there’s any other way to combat it other than sleep.

The first time I dropped, I was expecting that I’d feel the way I’d heard everyone else feel, but I didn’t. I was mostly just sleepy. I’m a bit quieter than usual, and I’m a bit, strangely enough, calmer than usual. I don’t understand that either but there it is I guess. So I slept that night and slept really good, and have done ever since.

Talking to my Dom after a scene helps.. quite a bit. I’d bet that if he hung up the phone after ending the scene, I’d be a wreck. Luckily for me, that doesn’t happen.

I’d say that people should have a good idea of things they need after a scene e.g. chocolate, cuddles, whatever. It really will help you.

Not everyone goes to space.

When i first heard of subspace, like many submissives, I wanted to go there. Who wouldn’t wanna go to a place where they’re floaty and happy?

And, of course, like many people, the harder you try, the harder it is to get there.

Of course, it took a really long time to experience it. Once I did, it kinda scared me. My lovely ex Dom was very helpful. There’s only so much aftercare you can do 2,608 miles away, yall. But he stayed on the phone till I came back to myself a bit and checked on me throughout the day. *cue the “awe” noises*

So, now I know what to look for and how to achieve this goal. And at least for me, it was definitely worth the wait.

My advice for you lovely subs who wanna experience subspace, take your time. It shouldn’t be the goal. Enjoying each other should. Don’t be scared if it happens. Enjoy it!!

Have you heard of sub frenzy?

Yes. Yes I have. I experienced what I think was a mild form of it.

When I realized I had a subby side, I was really wanting a Dom. Like, really bad. I was a newb and didn’t know better, and because of that, well, let’s just say that my first *air quote* dom was a creeper.

The advice I’d give new subs is to look up sub frenzy and really study what it is. Take things slowly. Relax. You have plenty of time to do all the things and find a good Dom. One that deserves a capital D.

Thanks for reading!! I really hope this helps someone.